sometimes it just doesn't make sense

i've always looked up to u since i was young.

to me ure always perfect and i can always rely on u.

but now i'm always heart broken with the things u do.

u used to teach me to do the right things.

and u still do.

but now i question myself,

bout the things u do.

it doesn't seem like u're doing the right thing.

and i feel somehow alone in this journey.

u think i'm a grown up girl,

and u can start telling me about life,

but all those things u say bit by bit scrubbing away all those things u taught me,

and no,

i would rather consider myself not an adult,

if u think my age is appropriate for me to hear things that i don't want to,

and it hurts.

i keep it to myself,

everybody has their story,

u have urs, and i have mine,

i'm not saying my story is any greater than yours,

but i can see myself having 2 distinct memories of u,

and i am holding on to the old you.

and please,

i am not ready,

even if u think i am.

and i am no angel,

so please forgive me for all those things that might've hurt you,

but you should know,

that i love u,

it's just that i'm always caught in between,

and too scared to move on,

with the things u say, with the things u do,

and also with the things he says, and the things he does.

and sometimes it's really hard to tell,

what is right,

and what is not,

and i'm not here to judge,

so let only He judge.

and as for me,

i will always love you,

but please remember,

i'll always be your child.